Top Ten Signs Your House Is Haunted By A Lame Ghost
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Posted in Friday Funny
From David Letterman
10. You see the wires when he floats
9. Instead of frightening people it just complains about the weather
8. Only moaning he does is over how much money he lost on Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae
7. Promises to keep the noises down after 10pm
6. Rearranges the furniture according to feng shui
5. Always asking if sheet makes him look fat
4. October 31: sends postcard from Cancun that says “Boo”
3. Rather than keeping you awake with a bloodcurdling scream, can only muster a dry, hacking cough
2. Screams when you walk into the room
1. Keep finding a copy of “Haunting for Dummies” lying around the house
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