A system to keep in touch with people

Posted by Ian McKenzie

Written on October 9, 2007

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In the few months I’ve had a Facebook account, I have connected with a number of friends that I haven’t seen in years. As we re-connect, I wonder why I didn’t do a better job of staying in touch in the first place.

Ray Blake has written a post on keeping connected with people. He says,

People drift apart for many reasons. It’s perfectly understandable not to call or make an effort for people you don’t really like, but why do we let people we respect and whose company we enjoy slip away from us? The main reasons are apathy and lethargy; we don’t care enough, and we’re too lazy. Paradoxically, the more secure we feel about a person’s friendship, the less effort we’ll take in staying in touch when distance divides us.

When I was younger, I did a better job of keeping connected with friends who didn’t live close. I regularly wrote letters to friends—mostly girls—who I didn’t want to lose contact with. As I grew older, I lost the habit.

Ray suggests, if you’re having trouble keeping connected to friends,

…you need to take action now to design a KIT (‘Keeping in Touch’) system to make sure this doesn’t happen in future.

Some people might consider a system to keep in touch with people to be too structured. After all, should relationships be spontaneous and informal? Well, if you’ve lost all your relationships because you’re too informal, maybe having a system is a good thing.

Click link to read Ray’s post: A system to keep in touch with people – Working On Me